Wanted: Custom Clothing for Dachshunds - by Oscar

Remember some of my nicknames? - Noodle, Gremlin, Magwai, Stripe. Well, they've given me a new one - Tube. 

It's winter, I'm cold all the time, and my clothes keep coming off as I run and play all over the place. So I'm running around the house naked and David tells me I look like a "tube". A tube! A paper towel roll with 4 legs, a head and a tail.

Tube. So I need better, more form-fitting clothing. I'm imagining something like a zippered knit tube-sock. (I'm too active for velcro). Or maybe one of those hideous aerobic exercise leggings popular back in the '80's? Yeah, that's before my time, but I've encountered a couple around the house... Zenny.  Those leggings are great for playing hide-and-seek with Tootsie.

Can anyone help me? It's a long time until summer.

By the way, the pic is apparently a 1910 postcard from the archives of one of MY favorite websites:   http://dachshundlove.blogspot.com .

The True Bush Legacy

We know it's true: you can fool some of the people all of the time. But we never knew exactly how many that was. Now we know. 

December 2008 Snowstorm - by Tootsie

Oscar got to ride, and I had to play sled dog. 

They say this mid-December snow storm was the bigger than anything seen here in over 30, 40, maybe 50 years. By the time it started to melt, there was over 14 inches on the ground, snow on top of ice on top of snow on top of ice on top of snow. This meant no regular walks for Oscar and me for over a week. I loved playing in the backyard, though. It's a good thing there were layers of ice mixed in the snowfall. Oscar and I still had trouble walking through the stuff. We both had some lowrider belly-dragging moments.

Disclaimer and Additional Commentary - by David

Let's talk about the "Marley image on a fish fillet" issue. I'm concerned that some might take offense to Tootsie's post about the images of Jesus Christ and/or the Virgin Mary on everyday items such as toasted cheese sandwiches. I had no intention whatsoever of insulting or denigrating either Christianity or the religious or cultural views of anyone. 

I am not a religious person, but I was once. I know enough about "the issues" to know that you can side either with the camp that follows the strict interpretation of the Bible, or the camp that sides with a church's (or cultural) interpretation of the Bible. But you can't do both. If you do, then someone will call you on it. 

There is nothing in the Bible that indicates that God speaks to selected people today through "images" on everyday items. Anyway, you might see one thing, while I see another. Think about it. 

Since any perceived image of Jesus Christ or the Virgin Mary is only based on the images presented by centuries of culturally influenced artists, as each individual might perceive these images, then we see what we want to see. Think about it. 

Who's REALLY the World's Worst Dog? Part 2 - by Oscar

I neglected to mention a couple very important exploits, plus one that will surly come my way. Some day and it will be mine. I already posted the rest of my exploits on December 25, 2008. 

* I've chewed through 2 USB thumb drives, totally destroying one and mangling another. I love pens and mechanical pencils, too. 

* Let's talk about the stairs. First, some background. My people really don't like carpet in the house too much, so they removed most of it. Since we're both vertically challenged, this created a problem for Tootsie and me. The hardwood on the stairs was really slippery for us and Tootsie, on several occasions, did a log roll down the stairs. Thump, thump, bang, thump, bang, thump. So our people had the stairs re-carpeted. I found a nice little corner of carpet on the bottom stair step that's so inviting. Rip, rip, shred, rip, shred, rip. 

* Remotes. There are 4 of them, just out of my reach. There's one each for the TV, cable, DVD, and sound system. So far, my people have worked really hard to keep them up on an end table out of my reach. Some day, one careless moment... mine.

Image of Marley's head found on a fish fillet - by Tootsie

You know how sometimes people find the image of Jesus Christ in a toasted cheese sandwich? Or how some people think they see the Virgin Mary in a tortilla or an ultrasound? Well, look what I found on a serving platter last night! See it? Right there on the lower right touching the lemon slices! Yes, it's an image of Marley's head on a fish fillet. Two little eyes, two ears, a little button nose. Isn't it cute?

Oscar doesn't think too much of Marley. Oscar thinks HE's the world's worst dog. Well, I love Marley and I think he's a hunk of burnin' canine love! Tall, blonde, handsome. Woof!

I talk with my ears, and more - by Oscar

Normal position, relaxed

Nervous, scared

Annoyed

"Yippee! I'm all ears."

I use my ears as air resistance stabilizers, much like flaps on the wings of an airplane.